power dynamics Archives - Adoption Unfiltered https://adoptionunfiltered.com/tag/power-dynamics/ Thu, 22 Feb 2024 15:41:08 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.7.1 https://i0.wp.com/adoptionunfiltered.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/cropped-Adoption-Unfiltered-Favicon-Square.png?fit=32%2C32&ssl=1 power dynamics Archives - Adoption Unfiltered https://adoptionunfiltered.com/tag/power-dynamics/ 32 32 203890745 Jessica Davis and Maureen McCauley https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/jessica-davis-and-maureen-mccauley/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=jessica-davis-and-maureen-mccauley https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/jessica-davis-and-maureen-mccauley/#respond Wed, 21 Feb 2024 23:55:04 +0000 https://adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=3796 “Our decision and application to adopt literally caused what happened to the very child we wanted to help.” —Jessica Davis, Founder and Executive Director of Kugatta, in ep 29. What if you discovered that the child you adopted was not actually an orphan, but someone who had been trafficked away from her family and placed […]

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“Our decision and application to adopt literally caused what happened to the very child we wanted to help.” —Jessica Davis, Founder and Executive Director of Kugatta, in ep 29.

What if you discovered that the child you adopted was not actually an orphan, but someone who had been trafficked away from her family and placed in an orphanage on your behalf? This is the situation faced by activist Jessica Davis, founder and executive director of the nonprofit Kugatta.com. You don’t want to miss her story of courage and conviction, and if you’re an adoptive parent, you will for sure be asking yourself, “what would I do?”

Maureen McCauley is mom to four interracial adoptees (all adults now), through U.S. infant adoption (her sons) and through Ethiopian adoption (her daughters). She also has three granddaughters. Through her long-running blog Light of Day Stories, Maureen investigates and brings us stories that need more light on them. She is a co-facilitator with Adoption Mosaic for “Seasoned Parents,” a class for adoptive parents who want to better understand adoption and whose children are adults, and “Navigating Estrangement,” for adoptive parents who are estranged from their adult children. Her wisdom, on display here, has helped so many.

Sara shares how accountability to the adoptee by the adoptive parent eventually becomes necessary. Kelsey offers a formal invitation to adoptive parents. Lori points to the importance of alignment of adoptive parent’s needs and adoptee’s needs. When they’re in conflict, which one takes precedence?

Watch

Listen

Engage Further

Related Conversations:

 

Jessica Davis:

 

Maureen McCauley:

 

Sara Easterly:

 

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

 

Lori Holden:

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post Jessica Davis and Maureen McCauley appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/jessica-davis-and-maureen-mccauley/feed/ 0 3796 Adoption Constellation Round Table Fall 2023 https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/adoption-constellation-round-table-fall-2023/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=adoption-constellation-round-table-fall-2023 https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/adoption-constellation-round-table-fall-2023/#respond Tue, 07 Nov 2023 20:56:52 +0000 https://adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=3048 “What is the hard part about adoption? ADOPTION is the hard part of adoption.” —A guest in Episode 21 Several adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents,

The post Adoption Constellation Round Table Fall 2023 appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

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“What is the hard part about adoption? ADOPTION is the hard part of adoption.”
—A guest in Episode 21

Several adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies gather around the table to suss out the question, “What is hard about adoption?”

  • Is it relinquishment vs adoption? Abandonment vs assimilation?
  • Is it severance of family and cultural ties?
  • Is it having to forage for information?
  • Is it ignorance coming into the adoption process for both expectant parents and adoptive parents?
  • Is it later feelings of guilt and regret for all we did not know?
  • Is it separation that’s felt all through the years?
  • Is it unexpected and unacknowledged grief?
  • Is it the gratitude that is expected?
  • Is it the imbalance in power dynamics?
  • Is it powerlessness over how the story is told?
  • Is it any number of other aspects brought on by the institutionalization of adoption?

 

Thanks to each of our guests—each of whom we interviewed for our book, Adoption Unfiltered—for sharing their personal experience, professional insights, and hard-won wisdom about the hard parts of adoption.

Watch

Listen

Engage Further

Some of our Round Table Guests:

 

Sara Easterly:

 

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

 

Lori Holden:

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
Previous slide
Next slide

Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post Adoption Constellation Round Table Fall 2023 appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/adoption-constellation-round-table-fall-2023/feed/ 0 3048 How to Engage with Other Constellation Members https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/how-to-engage/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=how-to-engage Tue, 02 May 2023 15:03:02 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=1594 What does healthy engagement look like around adoption? Rules for how to engage when talking with others in the adoption constellation.

The post How to Engage with Other Constellation Members appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

There’s a difference between listening to and taking from. People enjoy being heard but not being depleted.

What are the unspoken rules of engagement in adoption spaces? On one hand, it’s great to have our safe spaces for adoptees only, birth parents only, adoptive parents only. Yet we also benefit from having cross-triad conversations, too. Sara Easterly (adoptee), Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard (birth parent) and Lori Holden (adoptive parent) talk about how and how not to approach each other about adoption issues and topics.

Listen in for the rules of engagement that will help make adoption spaces feel safe and those in it feel respected.

Watch

Listen

Engage Further

Sara Easterly:

 

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

 

Lori Holden:

how to engage when talking about adoption

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
Previous slide
Next slide

Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post How to Engage with Other Constellation Members appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 1594 National Adoption Awareness Month https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/national-adoption-awareness-month/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=national-adoption-awareness-month Tue, 15 Nov 2022 17:03:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=731 It’s November, which means National Adoption Awareness Month. Adoption talk, adoption talk, everywhere you go! We’ve described it as overwhelming, emotional laboring, and metamorphing. What

The post National Adoption Awareness Month appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

It’s November, which means National Adoption Awareness Month. Adoption talk, adoption talk, everywhere you go! We’ve described it as overwhelming, emotional laboring, and metamorphing.

What was the original intent of NAAM? In what ways has the original intent expanded and shifted? Who has benefitted from NAAM, and who hasn’t? Who has historically owned the narrative, and how is that shifting?

Watch

Listen

Engage Further

Sara Easterly:

 

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

 

Lori Holden:

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Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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The post National Adoption Awareness Month appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 731 Adoption Constellation Round Table https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/adoption-constellation-round-table/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=adoption-constellation-round-table Tue, 11 Oct 2022 16:59:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=729 Sara Easterly (adoptee), Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard (birth mom) and Lori Holden (adoptive mom) kick of Season 2 with a special Adoption Constellation Round Table,

The post Adoption Constellation Round Table appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

Sara Easterly (adoptee), Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard (birth mom) and Lori Holden (adoptive mom) kick of Season 2 with a special Adoption Constellation Round Table, for which we invited adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and others who have something to say about adoption to talk together around this question: What is the biggest ah-ha you’ve had about adoption?

We also make a special announcement! Our book, Adoption Unfiltered, will be published in 2023 by Rowman & Littlefield! It will include the journeys and stories of the people in this round table, among others.

Watch

Listen

Engage Further

Sara Easterly:

 

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

 

Lori Holden:

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post Adoption Constellation Round Table appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 729 Adoption and the Abortion Debate https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/adoption-and-the-abortion-debate/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=adoption-and-the-abortion-debate Fri, 10 Jun 2022 16:54:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=727 What will happen when the Supreme Court officially rules on Roe v Wade? Sara Easterly (adoptee), Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard (birth mom) and Lori Holden

The post Adoption and the Abortion Debate appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

What will happen when the Supreme Court officially rules on Roe v Wade? Sara Easterly (adoptee), Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard (birth mom) and Lori Holden (adoptive mom) talk about the overlap between abortion and adoption. Not an easy conversation! Adoption and abortion are so often pitted against each other as opposite sides of coin when it comes to pregnancy decisions. But as Sara points out, there are similarities:

  • Both have inherent in them aspects of classism and racism;
  • Both tend to be shrouded in shame and secrecy;
  • Both come with disenfranchised grief, the kind in which loss is not acknowledged by society.

 

Other places we go:

  • “Would you rather have been aborted?”—asked of adoptees.
  • “It’s God’s will.”
  • The impacts, foreseen and unforeseen, of Safe Haven boxes.
  • How prepared are communities in which an option is taken away? What is in place to help women parent well or place their baby for adoption well? (The answers are frightening.)

Watch

Listen

Engage Further

Sara Easterly:

 

Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard:

 

Lori Holden:

Read the Comments

“I appreciate each of you and admire the courage it took to have this tough conversation.” — Emma Stevens

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
Previous slide
Next slide

Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post Adoption and the Abortion Debate appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 727 Ukrainian Crisis & Adoption Industry Corruption https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/ukrainian-crisis-adoption-industry-corruption/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=ukrainian-crisis-adoption-industry-corruption Thu, 28 Apr 2022 16:23:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=721 What happens when tragedy strikes and children need help? Where is that very fine line between helping via adoption and hurting via trafficking? How can

The post Ukrainian Crisis & Adoption Industry Corruption appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

What happens when tragedy strikes and children need help? Where is that very fine line between helping via adoption and hurting via trafficking? How can we best avoid crossing it?

Kathryn Joyce, who researched and wrote Child Catchers: Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption, joins Sara (adoptee), Kelsey (birth mom) and Lori (adoptive mom) offer their perspectives on this complex topic of crisis, orphans, and movements designed to help them.

Watch

Listen

Read the Comments

“Kathryn Joyce is astonishingly knowledgeable and thoughtful. The subject is so painful, and I thank you for holding this conversation.“
— Maureen

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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 OR
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The post Ukrainian Crisis & Adoption Industry Corruption appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 721 Birth Fathers & Adoption https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/birth-fathers-adoption/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=birth-fathers-adoption Thu, 14 Apr 2022 16:10:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=717 There aren’t too many spaces in which men are marginalized, but Adoption Land is one of them. Birth Father Ridghaus joins Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth

The post Birth Fathers & Adoption appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

There aren’t too many spaces in which men are marginalized, but Adoption Land is one of them.

Birth Father Ridghaus joins Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom Lori Holden to reveal the viewpoint of a lesser heard voice—that of a birth father.

Talk about complexity … power dynamics on steroids!

Watch

Listen

Read the Comments

“So many gems in this episode, including birth father insights but also beyond the scope of that specific experience, as well. Seriously loved this episode. Thanks to everyone.“
— Marci Purcell, Adoption Knowledge Affiliates

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post Birth Fathers & Adoption appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 717 Money in Adoption https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/money-in-adoption/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=money-in-adoption Mon, 28 Mar 2022 16:05:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=711 Money in adoption affects all of us. But it affects each of us differently. Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive

The post Money in Adoption appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

Money in adoption affects all of us. But it affects each of us differently. Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom Lori Holden talk about why domestic infant adoption is so expensive, what goes into the fees, and what happens when people in desperate situations: (A) women in unplanned pregnancies and (B) people with Baby Fever—use the Internet to search for a solution to their problems. Not to mention (C) how it feels to have a price tag attached to your existence.

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Listen

Read the Comments

“This episode is one of the best adoption podcasts/vlogs I have ever seen. I wish every individual contemplating an adoption could see it before they make their final decision. It also teaches us why we WANT the adoption process to be Hard and THOROUGH. Not everyone is cut out to be an adoptive parent. THANK YOU for your consistent and heartfelt commitment to adoptees’ best interests.”
—Gayle Swift

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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Order at Bookshop.org
 OR
Order on Amazon

The post Money in Adoption appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]> 711 Problematic Behaviors of Adoptive Parents https://adoptionunfiltered.com/podcast/problematic-behaviors-of-adoptive-parents/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=problematic-behaviors-of-adoptive-parents Thu, 24 Mar 2022 16:00:00 +0000 https://www.adoptionunfiltered.com/?post_type=podcast&p=708 Adoptee Astrid Castro of Adoption Mosaic, joins Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom Lori Holden to discuss some of

The post Problematic Behaviors of Adoptive Parents appeared first on Adoption Unfiltered.

]]>

Adoptee Astrid Castro of Adoption Mosaic, joins Adoptee Sara Easterly, Birth Mom Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Adoptive Mom Lori Holden to discuss some of the problematic behaviors of adoptive parents. Listen in to understand the unintended effects adoptive parents sometimes have on others in their adoption triad, perhaps without even knowing. (Don’t worry. We plan to cover other problematic behaviors in future discussions.)

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Read the Comments

“What an IMPORTANT conversation!! This is what it looks like to bring our community (adoptees, a birth mom and an adoptive parent) in the same space to have tough conversations about adoption.”
—Astrid Castro, Adoption Mosaic

Episode List

Load More

Sara, Kelsey, and Lori reveal candid perspectives on adoption—along with those of 50 other adoptees, birth parents, adoptive parents, and allies—in their recent book, Adoption Unfiltered, now available by Rowman & Littlefield.

“Easterly, Vander Vliet Ranyard, and Holden model beautifully in Adoption Unfiltered the complexities of the Both/And of adoption.”
—ASTRID CASTRO, adoptee and CEO/Founder of Adoption Mosaic
“The rare opportunity to experience an adoptee, birth mother, and adoptive mother communicating honestly and compassionately offers a much-needed model for those navigating the inevitable tensions and joys that exist in adoption.”
—ANGELA TUCKER, adoptee and author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity and Transracial Adoption
“Nuanced and thought-provoking, this book should be required reading for everyone, from adoptees and their families to adoption professionals and policymakers. This book is a true gem that offers a unique perspective on adoption and illuminates the way forward for understanding, healing, and growth.”
—BETSIE NORRIS, adoptee; founder and executive director of Adoption Network Cleveland
“As both scholarly examination and deeply personal narrative, this is a carefully crafted, highly respectful, broadly readable examination of adoption. This is a meeting of minds, hearts, advocacy, and empathy. There’s just so much here!”
—GLENN MOREY, adoptee and creator of the Side by Side project and the New York Times Op Doc and Audible Original Given Away
“Adoption Unfiltered is what happens when people really speak up and listen to each other in community and invites us to embrace its lessons of enlightenment and the possibility of personal and systemic change. This authentic, dynamic, and unique work is an important contribution to the adoption canon.”
—SUZANNE BACHNER, adoptee; author and director of the award-winning play The Good Adoptee
“As a person adopted in the 1960s, this is the kind of ground-breaking book I wish my adoptive parents had read. It does not shy away from the harsh realities of what adoption truly means to everyone. The pages are full of honest accounts of the emotional impact to all parties. I identified with it all and read each word with relief that this factual book is now informing our culture.”
—ZARA PHILLIPS, adoptee, singer, songwriter, playwright, and author of Somebody’s Daughter
“I highly recommend Adoption Unfiltered for anyone but especially for the adoptee and their parents, biological and adoptive—and it should be mandatory reading in adoption education and for anyone considering adoption, as it will help prevent the ongoing trauma we adoptees typically experience in most adoptions to date.”
—LYNELLE LONG, adoptee and founding director of InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
“Adoption Unfiltered is the most important book of our modern adoption generation. With grief and loss existing in a space with hope and healing, we finally get to see a glimpse of those lived experiences through adoption in a way that is relatable, educational, and tangible. We finally know better, and this book is doing better.”
—ASHLEY MITCHELL, birth mother and founder of Lifetime Healing Foundation
“Adoption Unfiltered is required reading for anyone who is part of the adoption constellation, including the central core triad. Using voices and perspectives from adoptees, birth parents, and adopting parents, this book reveals the inner thoughts, challenges, and possibilities each have experienced within themselves and the American culture, providing a map to navigate these complicated and complex roles.”
—SUSAN DEVAN HARNESS, adoptee and author of Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption
“Adoption Unfiltered is a blazing, insightful, expansive, and informative triumph centering the lives of those touched by the complexities of adoption. The trio of authors present a masterwork that blends the perspectives and challenges faced by adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents in a way that holds their shared humanity while challenging existing systems in adoption.”
—TONY HYNES, adoptee, author of The Son With Two Moms, and training specialist at Center for Adoption Support and Education (C.A.S.E.)
“Finally … a truth-telling book that validates the lived trauma of adoption and shows a way out of the suffering through truth, courage, grieving, and change. The stories are moving, the analysis is sound, the compassion is comforting, and the call for change is clear. We must not and cannot remain unmoved. Adoption Unfiltered is a must-read for all who care, whether personally involved in a story of adoption or not.”
—GORDON NEUFELD, PHD, clinical psychologist, founder of the Neufeld Institute, and bestselling author of Hold On to Your Kids
“Adoption Unfiltered casts a clear, unflinching eye on the complexities, inequities, and failures of the adoption system, pointing to the need for a more ethical practice that centers the wellbeing of adoptees while considering all members of the adoption constellation.”
—B.K. JACKSON, editor, Severance Magazine
“Adoption Unfiltered belongs in the hands of all adoptive parents and those considering becoming one, natural parents who have endured adoption’s loss, adult adoptees who are on the journey of putting themselves together—and everyone working in the field of adoption. Expect to be surprised.”
—LORRAINE DUSKY, birth parent and author of Hole in My Heart and Birthmark
“Writing across their own divergent standpoints as adoptee, birth parent, and adoptive parent, the authors create a unique space for honing skills in listening and communicating across difference—essential for today’s often polarizing family communicative environment.”
—ELIZABETH A. SUTER, PHD, adoptive parent, professor of Communication Studies at University of Denver, adoption researcher, and adoption educator
“Adoption Unfiltered provides a clear-eyed look at adoption from those most impacted—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. I appreciated that they neither overly praise nor condemn the institution of adoption. Rather, they allow space for both the beauty and pain, aiming to make life better for this current generation of adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents.”
—DAWN DAVENPORT, adoptive parent and executive director of Creating a Family
“Brilliantly written, Adoption Unfiltered may not be an easy read (because of the way it challenges old ideas), but it skillfully and thoroughly probes the societal narrative about adoption, leaving the reader to deeply re-examine their own beliefs. Adoption Unfiltered should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entry into adoption, as well as for their friends, co-workers, and family members.”
—KATIE BIRON, foster/adoptive parent; creator of the Family Connections Program™ and author of The Love Tree
“Adoption Unfiltered is a book we must gather around in the adoption community so we can share among the general public. Adoption is still largely misunderstood and the system of adoption in the U.S. is in need of an overhaul. It is clear from the first pages of Adoption Unfiltered that the voices within it are raising ALL the issues that should be considered as we move forward in evolving adoption in America and elsewhere.”
—REBECCA RICARDO, LCSW, adoptee, birth parent, and executive director of C2Adopt
“Adoption Unfiltered is a well-researched tapestry of adoptee, birth/first family, and adoptive parent voices, experiences, and resources expertly woven into a pathway of hope for future generations. The trio of authors have created a space for compassionate truism while dispelling myths with the hard facts about the complexities of adoption.”
—MARCIE J KEITHLEY, first parent, co-founder/executive leader of National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP), and author of The Shoebox Effect: Transforming Pain Into Fortitude and Purpose
“It’s never been more important for all parties of the adoption constellation to come to the table to craft essential reform. Change can’t happen, however, until we all have a better understanding of each other’s perspectives. Adoption Unfiltered has the ability to do just that—break down the walls to start candid conversations.”
—REBECCA VAHLE, MEd, adoptive parent; founder and executive director of Family to Family Support Network
“Adoption Unfiltered is not only an excellent resource, it is a needed, invaluable resource for every conversation and consideration of adoption—past, present, and future … As an adoptive parent who has felt the lack of substance and over-emphasis on adoptive parent voices and perspectives for far too long, this book deserves to lead and take up wide space.”
—TASHA JUN, adoptive parent and author of Tell Me the Dream Again: Reflections on Family, Ethnicity, and the Sacred Work of Belonging
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